


Just for You

by bigbearckm



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-08
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-14 03:54:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 16,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29911044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bigbearckm/pseuds/bigbearckm
Summary: hello! gonna keep this short and sweet.-this is not a ship fanfic (minors. pick axe go brr)-there will probably be no regular upload schedule-tw: suicide, anxiety, depression.so yea thats it.hope you enjoy!!started on 12/18/20k bye :)
Relationships: Jschlatt & Toby Smith | Tubbo & Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit, Niki | Nihachu/TommyInnit, Technoblade & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Toby Smith | Tubbo & Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Tommyinnit & Tubbo, Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson
Comments: 5
Kudos: 33





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hello! gonna keep this short and sweet. 
> 
> -this is not a ship fanfic (minors. pick axe go brr)
> 
> -there will probably be no regular upload schedule
> 
> -tw: suicide, anxiety, depression. 
> 
> so yea thats it. 
> 
> hope you enjoy!! 
> 
> started on 12/18/20
> 
> k bye :)

|Tommy pov|

The soulmate mark is both a blessing, and a curse. The blessing being, as people say, the chance at having some of the most powerful auras. Only 10% of people have the soulmate mark, and the powerful ones only come once every 100 years. That's the curse of the mark. Although you have a soulmate, which is cool and all, its also dangerous. There are people who have been hunting the marked to find, and steal their powerful aura before they get old enough to control it. 

That's where i come in i guess. Though i have the mark, i have no powerful aura, or abilities. Heck my brothers are more powerful than me, and they don't have the mark. 

Its a curse to have everyone be worried about someone trying to mug your aura. To be kept inside, and away until you turn 16.

Its a curse for someone to see your mark, and assume your super powerful. They ask,

"Hey! can you show me you aura? What color is you aura? Who's your soulmate?" I always just turn around and walk the other way.

Honesty!? The soulmate mark is more of a curse than a blessing. I'm 15, and I've only been outside my dad's huge estate a few times. I have no idea whats going on out there, and its killing me.

I'm not trying to be ungrateful, i have everything that a 15 year old would every want. A big house, a nice computer, a family. But then why do i feel so alone? 

I'll be turning 16 in a few weeks , and i cant say I'm not exited.

"Tommy?" Wilbur bursts into my room, panting. I turn away from my window, to look at him.

"Yea?" As soon as i say that though, my second brother comes in as well, his long pink hair swinging in his face as he desperately runs into my room.

"Haha I win Techno. I got here first." Wilbur teases tucking his brown mop of hair behind his beanie. 

"What!?" Techno is huffing and puffing. "Thats not fair- you used your aura to slow me down! We did say no cheating didnt we Will?" Techno glares at him, then turns to me. "You saw it right Tommy? His little sneaky blue mist."

I turn back to watching the rain outside my window. "Sure." I mumble. To be honest, I didn't see Will use his aura, but Techno is such a sore loser. He wouldn't talk to us for a day. Not that it really matters. They don't talk to me anyways. Not even my dad. 

They come in here, and have me judge who won what, who is better at what. Its annoying really. Some times I wish I could join them in their silly little games, but alas, I'm the only one in the family without an aura.

When I tell people that, they're always surprised. I get lots of, Isn't Techno your brother? Aren't you Wilbur's little bud?

_Aren't you Philza's son?_

To be honest I don't even know. I barley even see him anymore. You see, everyone in my family have super powerful auras, while I'm stuck with the stupid soulmate mark. 

I don't even know who my fucking soulmate is!

"Tommy...??" Will drags my name out, snapping me back to present. 

"Bruhh are you ok? Your spacing out a lot." Techno waves a hand in front of my face. I blink at him, frustrated.

"Why do you care." I snap. Techno steps back and looks at me.

"Tommy, why would you say that?" Wilbur says stepping next to Techno and putting an arm on his shoulder. 

"Just go away." I frown, flopping down on my bed. They start retreating out my door. "By the way Techno," I spit "Will didn't use his aura. your just bad at running." Techno turns and sticks his tongue out at me before walking out. Wilbur looks back at me one more time before following, leaving the door open. 

Deep down, I know they do care. I just feel so alone, all the time. I don't have any real life friends. I didn't play in the park as a little kid. I didn't go to middle school dances. I didn't experience high school. I didn't get to go to the Aura Academy. I've never had someone to back me up. Its always been just me. Just Tommy. No one else. 

Just me in this gigantic house with a bunch of tutors my dad hired to "find out" Why a child of Elytran doesn't have a powerful aura.

_Just me._


	2. What are the Odds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tw: mentions of self harm

|Tommy pov|

I look out the window to our garden, and the street. There are cars bustling around, and children walking home from school. Across the street from our estate Elytran, is the Aura Academy. Where all the powerful kids go after two years of high school. 

Its a beautiful school. And a fun one too, though i wouldn't know. I've heard so much about it from my brothers.

Everyday, they walk across the street to go to school. To learn about how much power they have. This year is their third year, since they are both 19. I would be going this year if it wasn't for the "no aura" thing and the stupid mark. 

I can't say I'm not jealous, as i watch a group of boys play a game of ball. Each of them making small colorful balls of mist out of their auras that dissipates when it hits someone. Instead of going to school and having a good time, I'm stuck in the house while people watch over my carefully. To check that I don't escape. I have before. That's why my dad hired people to stand outside. 

I've given up by now. I used to try and sneak out to play with the other neighborhood boys, but half the people just laugh and call me names. 

_oh look its that child of Elytran with no aura_

_Look there's that loser that broke the chain of powerful auras_

_There's that weak little boy with the soulmate mark that can't do anything_

_his family must be ashamed of him_

The other half doesn't even know I exist.

_There's a third child?_

_It isn't just the twins?_

_there are three Elytran kids?_

_Not just Techno and Wilbur?_

What do i exist for? No one knows me. No one talks to me. No one cares about me. I just want someone who cares. 

I hear a knock at my door. That's the snack i get at 3pm.

"Come in." The door opens and a blond girl walks in.

"Here's your food Tommy." She smiles setting down some cheese and crackers on my desk next to the work i was supposed to do today. 

"Thanks Niki." I smile at her. Niki is one of Wilbur's friends. She came here to study at the academy from Germany. I'm really grateful for her. I know i can tell her anything, and she wont judge me.

She starts out the door, "Don't forget to take your second anti depressant for today. I put it on that napkin. " she says pointing at the crackers. 

I sigh and nod as she leaves. The anti depressants are mostly for Phil's peace of mind. I don't find that they really help. But I take them anyways, knowing that it will reduce the amount of security on me. I guess they might help a bit, since i don't feel the need to cut anymore. But that might be because I haven't had access to blades in a few years.

Ever since Techno walked in on me cutting when i was thirteen, They all treat me like a baby. I never get butter knives with my food, and i don't have access to the kitchen, or the medicine cabinet. 

They think I'll try to off myself, and they're probably right. I don't even get to go to the bathroom alone. Someone always has to stand out side the door. And if i don't come out within 10 minutes, they come in.

I used to think life was bad before i got caught. I was wrong of course. 

I walk over to the floor to ceiling mirror across from my bed, completely avoiding the food. I hate the mirror. I wake up every morning just to see my frail, pale body in the mirror. i hate it. 

I look at myself in the mirror, tracing my hand across the cursed mark behind my left ear. Its a small circle like all the platonic soulmate marks. The romantic ones are more common, taking the shape of a heart.

Its glowing yellow like it always does, signaling that my soulmate is fairly close by. I hear it turns different colors when you meet them. But I don't know. its different for everyone. One thing that is constant between all marks, is that when your soulmate dies, it turns black. Like a tattoo, a permanent reminder.

But I don't give a fuck about all this soulmate shit.

Phil has asked me many times if i wanted to go hunting for my soulmate, and I always turned him down. Though half of me kind of wants to do it because that is the only circumstance that he will let me out of the house. 

I hear the door open and my brothers chattering excitedly. They're home from school i guess. I head back over to my bed, pausing to look at the untouched cheese and crackers. The thought of eating it makes me want to barf, but i know that Niki will be mad if she comes back later to a full plate. So I chug the pill with some ice cold water, and start nibbling at the cheddar.

I'm sitting at the dinner table with my brothers. The two twins are chattering on about stuff again while i sit in silence and pick at my food. They don't care about me. I'm not even here.

"What are the odds-" I start, the room falls silent. I never, ever talk at dinners. Wilbur and Techno stare at me, i look down at my food. 

"What Tommy??" Wilbur peers at me. I snap my head back up at them.

"What are the odds of you guys even realizing if i was gone?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter two! hope your enjoying! this is a decently long chapter :) 
> 
> actually hit the 1k words this time
> 
> i know the first few chapters are a bit cringe, but ples give me a chance


	3. Why dont you Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> CW: eating disorder

|Tommy pov| 

The twins looked at each other, concerned. 

"What do you mean?" Wilbur looked down at his plate. I don't want to answer him. so i take a big bite of spaghetti and immediately regret it. I haven't eaten this much food in days and I feel like I'm going to be sick.

"Uh- Tommy? You good bro?" Techno makes his way over to my side of the table, patting my shoulder as i gag, trying my hardest not to barf at the table. Eating may feel natural for some people, but having had an eating disorder for most of my life, it doesn't come naturally to me. I takes everything, to just eat one chip. It just doesn't feel right. The thing is, i don't not eat because i want to feel skinny, or have a nice body. It gave me a sense of mastery when my life was out of control. It numbs me emotionally. It gave me something to obsess about, like a mental fidget spinner, so that I didn't have to face a troubling reality. 

"Niki!??" Wilbur yells, and Niki comes running over from her bedroom. She kneels down next to me and rubs my back.

"Oh... Tommy... I told you, if you haven't eaten in a while, take it slow." She wraps me in a hug. I feel safer. "You don't have to swallow it honey." She hands me a paper towel, and i spit it out, tears running down my face. Why can't i just be normal, and eat like everyone else? I sit in Niki's arms for a bit until Wilbur taps me on the shoulder lightly. 

"Was there something in the food that you didn't like?" He looks at us, concerned. Niki glares at him, and starts to get up, I grab her hand. She looks back down at me, shaking her head. 

"Gosh Will. You don't even care enough to know whats going on with Tommy. All you ever worry about are your stupid little aura tournaments. You don't know how much he's struggling. You don't see him everyday like i do, and wonder how to possibly help him. For heavens sake! You guys knew about his depression, and you just threw some pills at him and called it a day!"

She doesn't raise her voice, but she sounds scary just as well. Wilbur gaps at her, turning to study me. I shut my eyes tight, not liking how everyone in the room is looking at me. Everyone's studying my every move, probably just noticing how frail i am. How miserable i am. How much I'm dying on the inside. 

Its true that my mental issues started quite a while ago, but back then, I would hide it. I was good at hiding it. I smiled and laughed when i was mentally crying, I still ate in front of everyone. I wore long sleeves all the time to hid my scars. I didn't show how much i was hurting. But then I started to realize that it didn't matter if i hid it or not. Because no one stopped to ask me how i was, and no one heard me each night when i cried silently. It didn't matter because no one noticed anyways. 

To be honest it hurts more now as my brothers try to hug me and tell me that its going to be ok. I stiffen up, I don't need your pity. I don't need you to notice me. I've gone this long without you and your love. If you didn't care then, why do you suddenly care about me? Why pretend that you care, when you really don't? 

As i lie in bed that night, staring at the bleak, white ceiling I realize that I'm so sick of staying inside, and following the rules. I'm 15 for heavens sake! I don't need people to protect me. I sit up, and rub my eyes, slipping on some jeans and a red and white shirt. 

|Techno pov|

I'm really worried about Tommy. I didn't know it had gotten so bad. I drag a hand across my face, Niki is right. I feel really bad that we haven't been paying attention to him.

My mind keeps going back to the day i caught Tommy cutting. He was only thirteen. I remember being surprised, because depression was the last thing i would of thought of from Tommy. He was always such a happy character. Laughing, and always making jokes. 

But nonetheless, I found him, sitting in the bathtub with the curtain drawn. Blood and tears everywhere. He had his sleeve rolled up, revealing how often he actually did it, I could tell it was a lot. I always wondered why we hadn't caught him earlier. To be honest, looking back it was pretty obvious. He always wore long sleeves, and he was home alone everyday. He thought i was still at school that day, but i had come home early due to winning my tournament against Dream. 

I suddenly hear a loud slam and a thud coming from the opposite side of the house where Tommy is. It jolts me awake, making me suddenly aware of every noise. I crept out my door, making not to wake Will next door. I charge up my bright pink aura, making enough light to walk without tripping on anything. 

Once I reached Tommy's door I try the door handle. Its locked. Its not an issue though. Unlike most people, i have something called hyper control. Its where my aura becomes like an extension of myself, making it easier to do certain things. For example unlocking doors from the outside. I focus on the air inside Tommy's room, spawning some of my pink mist in there to open the door for me.

The door clicks open, reveling Tommy's room with his window wide open. I slap a hand over my mouth. Tommy's room is on the third floor. Theres no way he could sneak out with the bed sheets. But I guess he did, because there is a long rope of bed sheets and blankets hanging ou the window. 

Panicked, I send to pieces of my aura to go wake Wilbur and Niki. Then taking my self to wake up my dad in person.

|Tommy pov| 

It worked. I can't believe it worked. After Techno fell for my bait that i left out the window, I snuck out of the closet, and right out the front door. There were no guards there, as they were out looking for me.

I'm gonna have some fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3!
> 
> anyways tysm
> 
> ly <3
> 
> -bear
> 
> |1135 words|


	4. Four- adventure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tommy finally goes outside to touch some grass.

|Tommy pov| 

I cant believe it. i walked right out the door without anyone noticing. I can smell the fresh cold air, and touch the snow covered trees for the first time in a while. I realize too late that it is really cold, and I'm only wearing a t-shirt and jeans. I shiver, almost regretting sneaking out. 

I can smell fireplaces burning from the houses near by, and the minty smell of fresh pine needles on the ground. It feels good to be outside again, connected to human life. Though it is eerily quiet considering its one in the morning

My sneakers trudge slowly in the snow as i make my way across the street, not bothering to use the cross walk. The Academy looms over me menacingly almost like its mocking me. The windows are all dark, the only source of light coming from the next street lamp.

Speed walking past the large school, i make my way towards the city. I break into a jog, listening as my feet crunch down on the fresh snow. 

I don't notice at first, but there are tears streaming down my face. This is what they've been keeping away from me. I suddenly feel free, running in the cold snow. They've been hiding me away, not ever letting me feel the air, the ground. I realize, I don't feel. I don't truly experience life.

I'm free now, even if its just for a short time. I close my eyes, enjoying the blissful silence, and the sweet cool air against my face. 

I turn into an alleyway, trying to take a shortcut, only to run into a group of three boys with aura swipers held in their hands. They all look up from their circle, observing me as I back away.

"Hey... isn't that one of the Elytran kids?" They glance at each other, holding up their deadly weapons. That's all I needed to hear, I bolt out of there. I run around the block, the boys not to far behind me. I know I shouldn't be scared, for I have no aura for them to take, but they would kill me just as well. Just to brag that they've killed a child of Elytran. 

I turn into another small alleyway, looking behind me to see the biggest one closing in on me. Not looking where I'm going, I crash into something in front of me, sending both me and it tumbling down. 

I push myself off the ground, just to bump face to face with the aura swiper. 

"Please don't" My voice shakes, as i hold my hands up above my head. "I don't have an aura." the boy holding the swiper to my head scoffs.

"You expect us to believe that kid?" The second boy smirks, handing him the cartridge for storing stolen auras. He pops the cartridge into the device, pulling the leaver and resting his finger on the trigger. 

"Say goodbye to your aura. Bye. Bye..." and with that, he pulls the trigger. 

"NO!!!" A voice coming from behind me shouts before a dark green force field of mist surrounds me out of nowhere, lifting me off the ground. My eyes widen when I spot where the mist is coming from. A small figure wearing a cloak.

"WHAT THE FUCK." As I franticly try to break free, I see the group of boys retreating slowly. They look at me in awe, before running off into the distance. 

I drop to the ground suddenly, making me grip my arm in pain. I rock on the floor quietly. I should have never left home. They must be looking for me. I just pray they didn't call my cousins. Dream would find me in just a few hours.

I suddenly feel aware of someone staring at me from behind. I turn to look at the hooded figure that saved me.

"Hey." I whisper.

"Hi." They respond.

"You didn't have to do that-" 

"No- I did." I get cut off, "You're a child of Elytran. You're powerful." 

"First of all, you seem pretty powerful yourself. I've never seen anyone with so much control that they can lift someone. And second, I don't have an aura. I would have been fine." 

"Oh. Well, too late now! I'm Tubbo." Tubbo hold a hand out to me cheerfully. I grasp it giving it a small shake.

"I'm Tommy." I smile. I find it strange that he just saved me without a doubt, then when I told him he didn't need to, he just brushed it off. Who is that selfless, that they would put themselves in danger to save a stranger? 

"TOMMY!" I turn around, filled with dread. I recognize that voice. Sure enough there's my cousin, Dream. He's appropriately clothed in a green hoodie, unlike me. The mask he insists on wearing bounces up and down as he runs up to me. 

"WHERE THE FUCK HAVE U BEEN?" 

"Uh- i went for a walk?" I look down at my feet, shivering from the cold.

"Tommy...Do you know how worried everyone is?" he tilts his head at me. "Why are you out here all alone?" 

"I-I'm not!" I wiz around, searching franticly for the boy who saved me. But he's gone. Its just me and Dream alone in the alley.

"C'mon I'll take you home." He grabs hold of my arm, attempting to haul me through the snow.

"I can walk by myself you green bastard." 

As soon as i walked through the front door, I'm greeted by my whole family. They're all standing by the door waiting. They all snap their heads up as they hear the door open. The room is barely lit. The only source of light is Techno's aura, shinning softly through the dark. I look down at the ground feeling lots of eyes burning into me. 

"Tommy." I look up to see my dad still in his night robes and slippers. I shuffle my feet.

"Yea...?" 

"Do you have ANY idea how worried we all were??!?" He looks down on me slightly as I cower, his white aura fuming from his ears. "Something terrible could have happened to you!!" 

"Phil, if I can, I'd say Tommy is fine. Maybe a bit cold and dirty, but FINE." a girl states. I look to see who it came from, my eyes widening when i realize who it is.

"EMMA?!?" Dream's sister sheepishly waves at my, smiling slightly. 

"Hi Tommy... long time no see?"

"What the fuck _Drista_?!?" I sneer using her old nick name. "Why haven't you come and visited me? Like, at all??" 

I'm mad. I haven't seen my cousin's in YEARS, especially her. We used to be so close. We used to do everything together. Then out of nowhere, I stop seeing her and Dream. I thought it was just cuz Dream and Techno didn't get along, but for the next three years I heard nothing from her. Not even a text message asking how I was doing. 

I was honestly really hurt. I didn't know anyone, or have any friends. And for someone so close to just drop out of you life is really surprising when you thought you were loved. 

"Well, you know how Techno and Dream are..." She scratches her neck, turning away from me. 

I can tell she's lying. But I'm used to being lied to. Because they're all liars. 

_Liars._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed chapter four! starting to finally get into the story!
> 
> yay :D
> 
> -bear
> 
> |1240 words|


	5. Liars

|Tommy pov|

"You're grounded Tommy." Phil looks at me with the most menacing glare. 

"What the fuck!" I pout. "I was literally just going for a fucking walk." 

"You could have gotten seriously hurt! You could have run into wipers Tommy!" Phil puts his hand on my shoulders attempting to look me in the eyes, I look away.

"I did." I look straight into his eyes, daring him to say something.

"YOU FUCKING WHAT?!! WHO KNOWS WHAT COULD HAVE HAPPENED TO YOU TOMMY!" I flinch at his yelling, but yell back with confidence.

"IF YOU DIDN'T NOTICE, I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING AURA. NOTHING WOULD HAVE HAPPENED TO ME!" I run a hand through my hair, looking at everyone in the room, daring someone to say something. I take a deep breath in, feeling quite light headed. I don't normally talk much, let alone yell. "So you can stop paying for those stupid fucking tutors. I'm almost 16. No one gets their aura this late." I sniff, holding back tears. 

"Tommy-" Niki tries to comfort me, but I'm done with this. I shove her away. She stares at me with shock, still holding her arms out for a hug. I feel bad, but instantly shake it off. She just pities me. 

I slowly lowering myself to the ground, my breath laboring. I'm so fucking sick of this. All this pity. I don't need any fucking pity. I've always handled my self, and i continue to handle myself. 

I notice Phil looks at the twins with concern. Wilbur mouths something at him, his eyes darting around the room 

_tell him._

I cock my head at Emma with confusion, but she just shakes her head and turns away.

Tell me what idiot? Tell me how I'm a disappointment? A burden to the family? It's fine, you don't have to. Because i already fucking know. 

No one says anything. The tension in the room is unbearable. Everyone is looking at me. Some with pity, and some with concern. I'm so sick of it. 

"Stop staring at me." I get up off the floor, tears streaming down my face and walk out and up the stairs to the comfort of my own room.

I walk up the large, marble white staircase, making sure to express my anger by stomping. 

With shaky hands I open my door, walking into the large blue painted room. And of course, the second I walk in, I see my stupid tear stained face in the full sized mirror. I walk closer to it, taking in my appearance. Both my nose, and my ears are bright red. And my hair is all over the place. 

I sigh running a hand over my face. Why did I think it would be good idea to go out? I was just feeling so trapped, so tiny in this giant house. I wanted to make an impact on the world. I don't want to die without even making a footprint in the snow. 

My shoulders start shaking. I watch my self in the mirror as tears stream down my face. I lean my head backwards, closing my eyes. I don't know why I'm crying. I'm being stupid. If Phil thinks this is what's best, then why am I questioning him? He only wants what's best for me right? 

Most times it doesn't feel like it. I'm miserable. I just wanna die. Everything feels so out of my control. I'm not in control of my own life anymore. 

I massage the back of my neck, passing right over the soulmate mark. I glance back at myself through the mirror again. I gasp.

_What the actual fuck._

I run my fingers over the all to familiar mark. instead of its usual white hue, its a pine tree dark green. My heart lurches, I slap a hand over my mouth to muffle a squeak.

_fucking shit._

_I met my soulmate?_

_I only saw those wipers and that boy. That boy... no. I'm sure its impossible. He was so powerful. I could never be as good as him._

I rush out the door wanting to show someone, but I stop myself. No one would give a shit about it. I still don't have an aura. I still don't know who it is. I know it cant be the boy in the green cloak who saved me. I will never be anywhere close to matching his power. Soulmate are equally as powerful, and I'm nowhere close. 

I deflate, flopping down onto my large, fluffy bed. I don't even bother to put on clean clothes before pulling out my phone to scroll through twitter for the next few sleepless hours.

I feel defeated. For a second there, I thought I had a chance of redeeming myself to my family. But no. I'm still a burden. And the mark is still ruining my life. 

As I drift off to sleep to the peaceful sway of the trees flowing with the wind outside, I can't help but still have hope. Maybe I am powerful, and everyone else is just lying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> have a good night.
> 
> ly <3
> 
> thanks
> 
> -bear
> 
> |1015 words|


	6. Niki

I hear my door creak open, and someone smaller steps in. I listen to their footsteps while pretending to be asleep, recognizing them as Niki's.

"Tommy?" Niki whispers. She's standing at the foot of the bed timidly with her hands in her sweater pockets. I shift, still pretending to be asleep. I don't really want to talk to anyone at the moment. "Tommy. I know you're awake. Stop ignoring me." She says softly in her regular voice. 

"What do you want Niki." I toss the blankets off my face, and look at her. She is well put together considering its 7am. Her hair is combed through, and she's wearing a orange striped sweater with a pair of black jeans. Niki is the only one in this household who dresses appropriately. The rest of us just wear the same thing everyday. Aside from her physical appearance, she looks pretty rough. Her eyes are rimmed red, and she wears a strained smile. 

"I'm sorry if I hurt your feeling last night." She says , looking down at the floor. Guilt floods through me as I remember the events of last night.

"I'm so sorry Niki. I didn't mean to push you away," I get up out of the bed and walk towards her with my arm open wide. "I'll take the hug now." I embrace her in a hug, towering over her quite a bit. 

"I know this is hard for you Tommy. But i think you have to trust Phil on this one." She rubs my hair, humming softly. I nod barely, letting her know that i understand. I don't agree with her, but I don't want to get in another argument. 

I've always enjoyed Niki's company. Even when she first started living at Elytran she always took care of me. Sometimes it feels like Niki is the only one that cares. She feeds me, she listens when I'm sad, and she always know what's going on with me. 

I was eleven when she arrived. She built a strong bond with Will pretty quickly. They became good friends, making it less awkward for her to adjust to the UK. But everyone in the house respects Niki. She is the kindest soul I've ever met. Even Techno doesn't argue with her. 

When my Mom got killed when i was nine, I really needed a mother figure in my life. Niki came alone and did just that, I really appreciate her. 

I sniff, memories coming back. I lower my head down on her shoulder, feeling the tears soak into the fuzzy wool sweater. I close my eyes, focusing on her hand rubbing my back. I cling tightly to her tightly, seeking comfort.

"Tommy what's wrong...?" she says, worried.

"I- don't-" I choke on own my words, starting to shake with tears. "I d-don't know." That's the truth. I Really don't know why I'm crying. Maybe its the feeling of comfort for the first time in a while. Or maybe its just me being stressed. I guess i don't normally know why I'm sad. I blame it on my family, and my aura cripple, but why do those things make me so sad?

I used to feel numb all the time. I don't know what my purpose is. I just wake up, and do the exact same thing everyday. I never felt like i was changing the world in any way. The only goal everyday was studying hard, and figuring out my aura. But for what? What did I gain from that? Was it so i could go to the Academy? Or get a job when i grew up? Even if i did have an aura, I would go to the academy, and not know my purpose. I would study blindly, and hope to come out the other side of the tunnel. 

But it doesn't fucking matter. Whats the point of life when your just gonna die anyways? Why not just go away early? I still don't know what I'm supposed to do with my life. I am no longer numb, though I'm not happy either. But still, I don't miss not feeling emotions. It was due time for the dam to break. I enjoy a good cry sometimes. It relives my stress. It reminds me that i'm human. Even if i do feel like shit.

As i cry in Niki's arms i realize i need to get my shit together. I can't keep living in a cycle. I need to find something to look forwards to. Maybe then, my will to live will dig itself out of the ground.

I start to hiccup from crying so much, and trying really hard to breathe through my stuffed nose.

"Tommy... honey, do you need a tissue?" I nod, and she pulls away from the warm embrace to grab some off my bedside table. "Here." She hands me the almost empty tissue box. I blow my nose aggressively, wanting to be able to breath again. "I'm gonna need to get you more tissues huh?" She chuckles, sitting back down next to me. She tries to comb a hand through my hair, grimacing at how tangled it is. "Let me brush your hair Tommy." She gets up to grab a brush, despite my noises of protest. 

I sit and wait for her, still on the floor next to the foot of my bed. I sigh, using the last of the tissues to wipe the remaining tears. I look out the large window to my right. The sun blinds me as it bounces off the snow making it more intense. I guess I forgot to close my blinds last night.

i hear the door open again. Niki comes back in with a brush. I smirk at her.

"What the fuck took you so long?"

She glares at me, sitting on my bed. "Shut up. You known how big this house is Tommy." She pats the spot next to her on the the bed. "C'mere" 

I reluctantly make my way over to the bed. She's gonna know about the mark sooner or later. Might as well get it over with. I sit in front of her, crisscross applesauce, grimacing as she start to comb through the knotted hair. After a bit of pain and tugging, she decides that she's done with the back.

"Turn sideways." She attempts to twist my shoulders to turn me. I laugh, turning to the side for easier brushing access. She begins to brush again, but stops suddenly when she gets to my ear. I guess she found it. 

"Tommy-" She tilts her head to the side to examine it closer. I look back at her, fidgeting with the bed sheets.

"Yea..." I rub the mark with my hand, suddenly feeling self conscious. 

"When did this happen?"

"Last night." I look down, my leg bobbing slightly.

"You didn't tell me?" she says, furrowing her eyebrows.

"i didn't think it would matter." I frown, not meeting her gaze. She stays silent for a bit, to think i presume. 

"Do you know who it is?" she questions, but i shake my head immediately. 

"I only saw four new people last night. The wipers, and a small boy around my age. But it can't be him. He was really powerful."

She nods slowly. Letting out a long sigh. I can't read her expression. "You are going to tell the other right?"

I shrug "I don't know. I don't want it to be a big deal."

"This is a big deal Tommy!" She gets up excitedly, and starts walking towards the door. 

"No! Please don't tell the others. I don't know how i feel about it yet." I say, nervous. The truth is, I would rather figure it out by myself first. I don't want Phil swooping in here and taking care of everything for me like he usually does.

"Ok... but you gotta tell them eventually" Niki shakes her head nervously. 

"Thank you." I grasp her hands, pulling her into another hug.

"Also," she pulls away to look at me. "spend some time with Emma today. You haven't seen her in ages. I'm sure she'll want to catch up." 

I nod as she starts out the door.

"I have to go to school now. Take care of yourself Tommy." 

I wave good bye, and watch her, Will, and Techno through my window as they walk to the Academy. 

Now, i get up off the bed, and start walking to the wing where Dream's family used to stay when they visited. Emma is hiding something from me, and i want to know what it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter six! some Niki content for you :)
> 
> hope you enjoyed.
> 
> thanks 
> 
> -bear
> 
> |1461 words|


	7. Child of Revernet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (There is no shipping in this chapter. Just that nice broken platonic relationship)

|Tommy pov| 

I walk all the way to the south side of the estate. I don't go over this way that often, but it hasn't changed at all. The halls are painted deep maroon, and there are paintings everywhere. Its the exact opposite of my wing. My wing is painted a light sky blue, but instead of paintings there are shelves everywhere, all filled with studies on me. 

Dream, Emma, and their dad used to stay here quite often, visiting. Their Mom was my dad's younger sister, but even though that family is extremely aura rich, they never believed in buying expensive estates. They had a basic house, though much much bigger than an average home, was still nowhere as big as Elytran. After their mum passed away, their dad became very competitive. No doubt, I love my Uncle, I just think that all the tournaments he pressured his kids to win, really affected their childhood. 

I'd only been to Revernet once, and the wall were floor to ceiling high stacked with trophies. I guess it seemed kind of annoyingly ambitious to me. Maybe that's just me being salty. Techno has a lot of awards as well, but we only display the most impressive ones, the rest we keep in the attic. 

I finally reach the end of the hall where Emma's room is. I study the door, it looks exactly the same as when i last saw it. Big and white with cool swirly engravings. I remember walking over here, at night to hang out. We would sit in there for hours, just talking. We could never hang out in my room due to Techno's weirdly abnormal hearing. 

Taking a deep breath, I raise my fist to knock on the door. My fist almost connects to the door before it swings open suddenly, surprising me. 

"Come in." Emma is standing right in the door way. I open my mouth to say something but stop myself. I forgot that's her aura ability, she can sense nervousness or fear. That's probably how she knew I was there. The room is exactly the same as well, meaning its decorated for a twelve year old girl. She turns away to sit down on a nice windowsill couch, leaving me awkwardly standing in the door way. 

"Um- don't you have school today?" I say, trying to make conversation. She just looks at me and scoffs. 

"I graduated early, and I'm taking a few gap years before going to the Academy so I can focus on tournaments. Has it really been that long since you've seen me Tommy?" she scoffs. 

"Well, yes. I haven't seen you in three years idiot." 

"I suppose." She looks down at the plush bear in her hand. I make my way over to a tall desk chair and sit down, spinning slightly. We sit in awkward silence for a while. Until she finally say something. "I'm really sorry for not visiting you Tommy-" She looks at me sadly and I raise an eyebrow at her. "I just couldn't." 

"What do you mean you couldn't??? You live two fucking blocks away. You could have walked over here at any point in time to see me. Maybe even just say hello. But no- you disappeared when i needed you most. You were one of the only people i trusted. How could you?!" I let out everything I've been meaning to say to her for the past three years. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." She sniffs.

"Sorry is not gonna fucking cut it." I turn my back facing her.

"You don't understand-" 

"You think I don't understand??!? I KNOW you were just SICK of me. So you left, and forgot about me." I turn the chair around sharply to look at her.

"I didn't know you liked my company that much." she say timidly, not meeting my eyes. 

"You think all the times we stayed up talking, and all the memories we had that i didn't enjoy your fucking company??!?" I spit with venom. I'm so fed up with people lying to me.

"You don't know- how much I wanted to visit you. I KNEW you were going through a hard time." She's crying now, tears soaking into the poor stuffed bear. 

"Then why didn't you..? WHY didn't you visit me. I was in my most vulnerable state. I was stuck in the house. Do you think i would hesitate for a minute to visit _you_ if your dad trapped you in the house for three fucking years??"

She jumps up and takes a step towards me with a menacing stare. "They wouldn't allow it- they wouldn't allow it! You have to believe me. You have to. You don't know how many times I walked by Elytran and thought about you and how you were doing. You don't know how many times I was turned away when I knocked on the door." 

"W-what?? Why? Who didn't allow it?? " i say quietly, caught off guard. 

"I-I cant tell you." 

"What?!! Tell me. Right now." I step towards her, she looks up due to how tall I am.

"I think you should go." she points at the door.

"TELL ME!" I shout.

"LEAVE." She swings the door open with her bright red aura. The mist flies past my face, making my hair blow. I stare at her, tears leaking out of my eyes. This used to never happen. We used to get alone so well. We were the power duo. A child of Revernet and a child of Elytran that were best friends. We never fought. We were just two young kids that were shadowed by their brothers. 

I walk back to my wing with tons of questions swarming my head. I don't know who to trust anymore, but what I do know is that is need to find that boy. I need to find out who my soulmate is. 

So I start forming another plan to sneak out again. I know I'll get in trouble if I'm caught, which is quite likely will with this group of auras,

But at this point, I don't give a fuck. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you enjoyed sorry i took a bit to get this one out.
> 
> we got that good drista content :D
> 
> Tubbo content coming soon, hang on.
> 
> thanks :)
> 
> -bear 
> 
> |1083 words|


	8. Tubbo

|Tubbo pov pog|

I've never really cared much for the mark. I was already powerful enough and I knew it. I always crushed everyone in tournaments to the point where people hate me for it. I never understood why I needed a soulmate to be powerful. But I can't say it wouldn't be fun to have one. 

Like I said, I never cared much about the mark. Until a few years ago. I don't really know what happened, but it had caused me to lose a tournament. I'd been against that Revernet girl, I forget her name. The thing is, I could have beat her easily. Of course she is super powerful. being a Elytran descendant, but I've fought her before and won. So it was super strange for me when I became really weak. 

_Soft summer breeze blew through my hair, I can hear the arena going crazy already, but I was calm. This was going to be easy. I'd beat both the Revernet kids before. I could do this in my sleep. I pull on my tournament uniform. The simple,_ _tight_ _dark green shirt and black pants cling to my skin as I walk out to the sandy ring._

_The Revernet girl is already there. People whoop and cheer for her. She notices that I've come out, and smiles. I wave at her. She's always been nice for a high class aura. I have to keep in mind her aura ability. She's not an evil person, but if you didn't know she was nice, you would be scared for your life. She can sense nervousness and pain, and she uses it to her advantage. Basically meaning the longer the fight goes on, the stronger she gets. I wasn't scared, and I don't get scared easily. I would win in a landslide._

I didn't win. 

In the middle of the tournament, there was a moment where nothing but pain over came me. Which is not good for fighting someone who leeches off pain. The thing is, I didn't know where it was coming from. I had been dodging every one of her hits. My neck had just started stinging and burning, making me fall to the ground. I wasn't just physical pain either. There was deep emotional pain that came with it. It hit right into the very middle of your heart, searing your happy emotions. And that was it. I fell out of the ring, and passed out. 

_I could hear the crowd gasp as I fell to the ground. I hit the sand with a loud thud. The Revernet girl is already by my side, crying and franticly asking if I'm ok. I think I'm ok._

_But I guess I'm not because the bright sunny day starts to blink dark. The pain is real. My wrists burn and my neck is on fire. The loud noises and the cries of the Revernet girl blare in and out of my ears. Then it fades to a soft ringing. I close my eyes, finally giving into the darkness. I feel almost peaceful, except my neck still burns like hell. I try to rub my neck, but I can't move my limbs._

_As I fade in and out of consciousness I can feel myself being picked up by the paramedics. I hope I'll be ok._

Turns out, when I described the pain to the doctors, they told me that I wasn't physically hurt at all except for the bruises I earned from falling from five feet in the air. There was virtually nothing wrong or peculiar about me, except for the fact my soulmate mark was glowing bright red. 

I went back to my dorm that night wondering if my soulmate had wanted me to lose the tournament, or if it was my aura ability auto connecting itself to them. If it was the ladder that was yet another reason to hate my aura ability. 

My mom had left me because of it. Kids hated me because of it. Being this powerful was such a curse. My mom had hated that I could see right through her and all her lies. And the kids thought I was a mind reading freak. Not only that, but I have hyper control just like that Elytran kid Techno. But instead of being able to spawn my aura anywhere, I can fucking lift things. Including myself. 

If I could give away my aura, I would. Its ruined my life. But sadly, since I have hyper control, I'm immune to the wipers. Its just study hard and do tournaments for money now. I wish I had a companion. 

I guess the reason I'm thinking about this right now is because the color of my mark changed yet again. It's now a light blue. But it not a nice lovely blue, its dull and burnt out. Almost like gray. 

I've been wondering who my soulmate is for a while now, and how they are doing. I have some suspicions of who it could be, but I don't want to jump to conclusions yet. 

I lie in my dark dorm room staring at the ceiling in silence until I hear a whimper. I turn to the side of my bed to see my fox sitting by my bedside table, pawing at the bed. 

"Awh c'mere Squeaks" I whisper as not to be heard by the sleep patrol.

The bright orange fox climbs onto the bed, sniffing around until lying down next to me. I feel her soft fur tickle my face as she snuggles closer to me. I finally put my arms around her, and hug her like a teddy bear. 

She's technically not allowed on campus, but what are they gonna do? Fight me? So she stays, she keeps me company. 

I'm so tired, and I have class tomorrow. I'm one of the youngest in my grade. Because just like most high level auras, I graduated early. But I can't take gap years like all the rich kids because of my scholarship. Scholarships don't wait a couple of years for you, and I don't have enough money to pay for the Academy full price. So I'm exhausted, taking full blown classes at sixteen. 

Sometimes I just want to quit. But I can't. I have to study hard to graduate and get a good job. That way I can support myself without drowning in tournament trophies.

I guess it would be nice to have emotional support. I've never had someone by my side that I don't worry about them lying to me or leaving. 

I deserve it right? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter eight!! 
> 
> Here's some Tubbo content :))
> 
> i promise Tommy will meet him soon.
> 
> Thank you for reading!!
> 
> I really hope you enjoy the story so far :D
> 
> thank you
> 
> -bear
> 
> |1138 words|


	9. Tears

|Tommy pov|

"Tommy!" I whip my head around to see Phil standing in my door way. I quickly shift my soulmate mark out of view, caught off guard. 

"Yeah?" I respond innocently. He narrows his eyes at me, but doesn't say anything.

"Come down for dinner today. Em and Dream are leaving tomorrow." he stand awkwardly in the doorway, waiting for me. I shut the book I was reading and nod slightly.

"I'll be down."

"Great! We're having Lasagna! Your favorite right!?" He smiles wide, shifting in his sandals. 

"Yea." I smile slightly. This just proves how little he pays attention to me. It used to be my favorite food, but now anything with tomato makes me barf because my stomach is so weak and sensitive. 

"Ok! hurry up though, so the food doesn't get cold." He takes a look at me, smiling before walking out the door. I wave as he leaves, then shifting my attention back to my reflection. I think if I just brush my hair over it it will be okay. This is the kind of situation when i want long hair like Techno.

But I know how hard it is to comb. Will used to complain about it all the time. "Come on Tech! its so easy to brush my hair... why don't you do me a favor and cut yours off!?" Thinking about that just makes me sad. No one brushed my hair before Niki came along. Even when I helped Techno bleach his brown hair so the pink would show up, no one ever helped me. I'm not even mad about the hair. I don't care how my hair looks, but I guess it just really shows how much they care through their actions. 

I sigh, brushing my blond hair over the mark. I stare at my self in the mirror. I take a deep breath and hype myself up before starting out the door. 

I smell lasagna as i walke down the stairway. I feel self conscious when i step into the dinning room as everyone is except Will is already there. 

I turn my head to the side so they can only see the left side of my face. Just as a precaution y'know? As i sit down i glance to my right to see Niki burning a hole through my head. I know she wants me to tell them, but i don't know if i want to. I'll just turn into the main discussion topic.

"Who's ready for dinner!!" Phil comes through the door way from the kitchen with a large plate of hot lasagna in his kitchen mitted hands. Despite us having servants for somethings like the garden, Phil always cooked by himself. We did have a cook in the past but Phil fired him after he put aura retracting pills in my food when i was ten. Ofc nothing came out, but it was scary nonetheless.

"Oh Dad that looks so good wow." Techno is already staring intently at the lasagna with utensils in hand, ready to dig in. 

"Hang on there Techno, we gotta wait for Will." Phil glances up the stairs expectantly. "Will!! come down here! We are eating!"

no response. 

"do i need to go and get him-" Techno starts, but gets cut off by Emma screaming at the top of her lungs.

"WILBUR SOOT OF ELYTRAN. COME DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW WE ARE ALL HUNGRY." Phil, Niki, and Dream laugh as she takes a deep breath and turns to smile at everyone. "That should do it!"

We all burst out laughing as Will comes bounding down. Tripping and practically sliding down the stairs. 

"What!? Whats going on?! Why are all of you laughing at me?" he pulls down he sweater, recomposing himself before slowly sitting down in the chair next to Techno.

"Bruhhh why are you always late?! I'm hungryyy." Techno grumbles, playfully shoving Will. Now that all of us are here, Phil starts spooning out large squares of the piping hot dish in a circle around the table until a large block lands on my plate. 

Everyone starts to dig in, but i just fiddle with my fork and stare at it. 

"Whahai arghn't you e-eating?" Em asks me, her mouth full. 

"Not really that hungry i guess." I shrug.

"Huh." she turns her attention back to arguing about if hyper control or emotional advantages are better when it comes to aura abilities. 

I turn to Niki looking at her with pleading eyes. She shakes her head at me, then whispers 

"You better tell them today Tommy." 

"I don't wan- " I get cut off

"Hey Tommy!" Dream says to my from across the table. Niki glares at me again before returning to her conversation with Phil. 

"hi dream.." I say timidly. 

"Long time no see huh?!" 

"yea..."

"Uh- well, how have your studies been?!" He says enthusiastically despite my one word answer. 

"good."

"Um, well. Do you still have that bird that you had a few years ago?"

"Dream." i say, annoyed. He tills his head at me, smiling painfully. "That bird died before you guys deserted me." 

"Well- uh- did you have any other pets?"

I fiddle with my food for a bit before saying, "Well i had fish named Jessica before she committed suicide by jumping out of the tank, leaving me like everyone else in my life." 

Dream shifts uncomfortably, I chuckle to my self. I'm throwing major shade right now and his reactions are hilarious. "I'm joking! Don't worry, you're all good man. I understand that you were busy."

"Oh haha..." he smiles genuinely, and I talk to him about random shit the entire dinner.

Everything was going well, except for the fact i still hadn't eaten anything. But other than that it was a very nice dinner and I had some nice conversations with my family. I am proud of myself, i got through a family dinner without any major break downs. Of course Niki was glaring at me the whole night, but i just ignored it. They don't know about the mark, and its going to stay like that. 

Phil stands up plate in hand and heads towards the kitchen Everyone else is pretty much done as well so we start cleaning up the table. I pretty much know the drill. When we have family dinners all together like this, we eat. We clean up. Then we go to the living room and eat desert. Except this time while everyone starts to sit on the soft plush couches, Phil brings out mugs of hot chocolate instead of sweets.

"C'mere Tommy! Sit with me." Dream walks past me ruffling my hair in the process. My heart drops to my stomach as I realize the mark had been exposed. I hastily move to fix it, but its too late. Dream stands staring at me, his mouth wide open. "Uh- green... Your mark turned dark green!" 

I drag a hand over my face slowly as all eyes turn to look at me. 

_CRASH_

All eyes turn away from me to look at Phil. He has a hand over his mouth, and all the hot chocolate is mixed in with broken glass on the ground. I crack my knuckles slowly, trying to relive stress. I expect him to yell at me, or ask me questions, but he just lowers himself to the couch and starts crying. Techno and Will rush to his side, comforting and giving him hugs, but i just stand there, frozen. 

It's dead quiet besides the sound of Phil's crying, i can hear the pounding in my ears as blood rushes through my body. I can smell the hot chocolate that would have already been in my mouth by now, but instead is on the ground. Everyone is stood around Phil, so i start to back away slowly. I can feel my legs wobbling, and my hands shaking as i open the front door. 

I see the guards look at me strangely, but i bolt out of there. I run and i run and i run until i can't anymore. I start to realize that the guards aren't following me anymore. I find that strange, but I'm too tired to think about it. On top of that, i start to feel sick. 

Its so dark that i can't see anything so i just collapse on some random grass. I don't even know where i am. I lay on my back, staring at the stars as my vision begins to blink in and out. 

_Why was Phil crying?_

_Did i do something wrong?_

I roll over in the grass, but suddenly feel my stomach lurch. I know that feeling. I get up, and stumble my way to some bushes. I barf out the little food in my system, then dry barfing. I feel terrible. I can taste the sourness of my stomach acid in my throat, and smell the vile barf that sits in the bushes. I lay back down on the grass, listening to the crickets chirp through the late night.

I probably need to find that boy. I want to know why my life has led up to this, and what everyone is hiding from me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading once again! im not too good at using ao3 so bear with me lol  
> -bear  
> |1633 words| (wooo thats a longer one)


	10. Lypophrenia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lypophrenia- (lai-po-fren-ia) a vague sense of sadness seemingly without any cause.

|Tubbo pov|

I can hear my alarm clock ringing from my backpack, but i dont bother to turn it off. Its all the way across the room and I am so drained. I've been working on work for classes for over five hours now, and that was just the alarm signaling for me to take a break, or eat something. 

But i dont really care. I am pretty hungry, but i dont feel like getting up to make food. My coach would be upset if she knew. Shes the one who told me to set these stupid alarms. 

_Sorry Ms. Berley_

I make a silent apology to her before continuing my work, ignoring the alarm. Jada Berley is my aura coach. Every student must have a aura coach in order to participate in tournaments. Most families pay for good ones from the moment their baby turns five. My mom used to pay Ms. Berley, but when she left i had no money to give. Now Jada does it for free. 

I don't know why she sticks around. I just take up her time, she could totally drop me and take a richer client. But no, she kept me as a student even when i couldn't pay. Though she isn't much of a comforter, or a sympathizer, shes all i really have as family. Well, i guess she's more of a life coach. We don't hug, or talk about our lives or anything like that. She just makes sure that im healthy and feeling okay. 

Thats why she made me set alarms. She thinks if im too drained doing school, my aura will weaken. I dont really believe that. I've never had any issues with my aura being weak. Well, except for that one time. 

They only reason I'm doing what she says is because the believes rest will help me control my aura ability from auto connection. And of course its either true, or she really believes it will help because i can tell she isn't lying. 

I guess thats a perk of my aura. I can tell whos lying to me. Though sometimes I'd rather take the lies. I barely know anything about my aura ability. I only know a few things for sure. That its really unreliable, that it helps me see through lies, and can sometimes connect me to peoples brains, letting me see what they are thinking. Also the strange auto connect to my soulmate. 

The reason why i know close to nothing about my aura is because i haven't found anyone in the world with the same aura ability as me. On top of that, I'm the only known person with two aura abilities. Most people think i only have one. My hyper control is very much a public fact. But only a select amount of people know about my strange brain reading, and i want it to stay that way.

I'm in the zone, my fingers flying across my keyboard as i type up yet another essay. Even though school is tiring, i find it peaceful sometimes. It makes you feel like that paper or essay is the only bump in your life. That once you finish the paper, everything will be okay. I kinda like that feeling of easy stress. 

What i mean by easy stress is that you can solve that problem within a few hours, unlike life issues. The thing is, my life isn't even that tough. I make enough money from tournaments, and all i have to do is school. So why do i feel so weighed down? Why do i feel like im living in an endless cycle. Why do i always feel sad for no reason?

_Lypophrenia_

I had told Jada about my feelings one time, and she had said.

_"Oh honey thats lypophrenia"_

_"whats that?"_

_"i dont really know... i think its where you feel sad for no reason that you know of. Perhaps you aren't satisfied with how your life is going, or where you're headed."_

I think about that moment alot. I thought I was stable. I thought I was pretty happy with my life. But when you look into yourself more, there are things you didnt realize that you were still hanging on to.

I realized that i was still mad at my mom. 

I realized that i still _missed_ my mom.

I realized i was still lonely even though i had thought i had let go of the need for friends. 

I realized i didn't really know what i wanted to do with the rest of my life. 

I can hear and feel my stomach rumbling so i give in, shutting my laptop and heading to the fridge. I open it up, cold air blowing on my face. I only see vegetables and leftover pizza. Nothing that i wanted to eat real bad. 

I kinda want take out. It's already 8pm so the only place open will be that Italian place. That actually sounds so good right now. Warm meatballs and marinara sauce. I grab my cloak and phone, putting the hood of the cloak over my head before heading out the door. 

I smell the peculiar smell of a the dorm hallway that just got cleaned with like a bucket of Clorox. Its both pleasant and unpleasant at the same time. 

I walk down the silent hallway hearing only the muffled clonk of my footsteps. I feel weary as i step into the elevator looking at myself in the walls covered in mirror. I haven't even left the building yet and I'm already tired and lazy.

I feel kinda sad too. but i guess thats just lypophrenia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter 10 :))) sorry this ones a little short.
> 
> It was mostly just Tubbo in his thoughts. I hope to have chapter eleven coming out today as well so stay tuned. I might get lazy lmao.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed
> 
> thank you <3
> 
> bye bye
> 
> -bear
> 
> |1007 words|


	11. Hello?

|Tommy pov|

I stumble in to town feeling really nauseous, I walked back all the way i had came. Along the way, I started to notice things i had never noticed before. Like how squirrels run with their tail straight behind them. And how snow covered grass is crunchy. I want to know why the maple trees drop little helicopters. I wanna know why a puff of smoke comes out of me when I breathe. 

I realize that I dont really know a lot about outside. I know that sounds pathetic, but i really dont. I only ever learned about technical stuff, like why cows can only look side to side, and why people have different aura abilities. Two very different things, i know.

I pass by things that i only see on Google Earth or from my bedroom window. I touch things that I had forgotten what felt like. 

They haven't found me yet, but I'm sure they're looking. I better do what i wanted before they find me. 

As i walk i find myself hoping they don't find me. I know its strange, they're my family. And im freezing cold out here, but i just feel like nothing can hold me down. I feel fresh, like i could start over again with different people. Maybe that boy will let me stay with him.

What was I even planning on doing? Its not like im just going to go to that alley and find him. But of course i go anyways.

As i arrive to the very same alley where i met Tubbo, I spin around hoping to see his dark green cloak somewhere around the corner. I didn't have time the other day to really check out my surroundings, but as I look around I see quite a pleasant alley. There are shops and restaurants hidden in corners of the walls. A warm yellow light illuminates from the street lights, they even have flower pots hanging from the posts. It looks like something straight out of the fairytales. 

Its almost 8:30pm so there aren't many people, but i see some people coming out of this one restaurant in a path off the alley so I walk over there in curiosity. Its a small Italian shop with a cute hand painted sign that reads "Piatti". I step to the side as a pair walks out, giggling and smiling to themselves. I can smell the spaghetti as the door whiffs warm air out. I almost barf. Italian food just brings back bad memories. I don't even know why. 

Not wanting to have to smell tomato sauce anymore, I walk to an intersection of alley paths and sit down on a piece of soggy cardboard. I sit and watch people walk past me, they all look like they need to get somewhere. None of them stop to say hi. They just hurry past, giving me strange looks. 

Its not that late, but I'm so, so tired. I feel myself dozing off, my head slumping to the side slowly. I'm chilled to the bone, and I can still smell the sickening spaghetti blowing down wind to me. But as i start fading away, my senses start blinking out. I no longer smell the spaghetti. And i stop hearing the bustling of groups of people walking by. My vision starts blinking in and out until i think I'm asleep.

"Tommy..." A voice without a body whispers.

_I'm so tired._

"Tommy."

_Just ignore it._

"Tommy. Youngest child of Elytran."

_who would address me like that? I feel so respected._

I smile to myself, feeling peaceful. This must be a good dream.

But i suddenly don't feel very peaceful anymore.

"Kid! Fucking wake up." A stern voice shouts at me.

I guess it wasn't a dream either because I feel a cold hand yank me up from my cardboard seat, jolting me awake.

Surprised at the sudden movement my eyes dart around. The man who yelled at me is dragging me along the alley way. He has brown hair and wears a suit.

"Tubbo...?" I say groggily before mentally slapping myself. This man looks nothing like the petite boy in a green cloak. Hes handling me roughly, and has a deep voice that sounds somewhat familiar. 

When we finally get to his destination we are no longer in the pleasant lit up alley that we had just came from. No, this alley was more like how they are in the movies. Dark, damp, and smelly.

"I found you..." The man growls, making me shiver. 

"Who are you???" My voice shakes. He laughs, stepping away to let me get a better look at him. A tall shadow looms over me as i cower in the corner. Its dark, but i can make out certain features because of his red, powered up aura. He has light brown hair and sideburns. Though he is wearing a suit, he doesn't look tidy what so ever. He looks at me with a menacingly, scary look, his eyes glowing bright red. I think he expects me to recognize him because he throws out his arms gesturing that hes there, and great as ever. But i don't recognize him, even though he seems so familiar. 

I smile at him, getting up off my butt. I step closer to him, getting close to his face. "Who are you again..?" 

He steps back, surprised for a bit, but then suddenly getting angry. "You brat. There is no way you wouldn't remember me." 

"Uhhh- ahaha- hey, buddy...." I back up as he starts fuming. Somehow he gets even taller, and my posture gets even worse.

"Theres no way you wouldn't remember me." He talks to himself now as he walks even closer. He powers up his aura all the way. Balls of red spawn in his hands, and red horns spout from his head, looking almost like LED lights. 

I get even more terrified when he does a classic aura move. Knife. He walks towards me with a shimmering red knife, closing in by the second. I try to scoot away but its no use. Im trapped in the corner.

-

|Tubbo pov| (toob to the rescue yet again pog?)

I walk out of Piatti happy as can be. I have secured my food and now i can go back home. I walk down the alley way, turning into the complicated alley system. I'm so hungry and I can smell my food through the takeout bag. 

I ordered my favorite, lasagna, and even an extra sausage for Squeaks. They always know to give me an extra sausage because I always ask. Little do they know its for a fox.

I turn yet another corner, but stop when i hear pleading from the other turn. I know its probably yet another alley fight, but this one sounds serious. Sneaking down the tight, dark alley i can hear the voices clearer now. 

"Pls no-"

"Say my name boy. WHATS MY NAME?!" 

whoever is about to get smacked is never gonna recover from the sound of that voice. I peak around the corner, then pulling back suddenly. That boy will not only be smacked. He'll be killed. I've seen density manipulating auras. I've seen how their knives can kill in one swipe. That boy will be dead before he thinks his last thoughts.

_I should help him_

_This is what I've been training for right?_

I peak again, taking a closer look. I gasp. Its that same boy that i saved a few nights ago. Tommy. The Elytran kid. From the looks of it, he has no idea how the real world works.

I sigh, powering up my green aura. I take a deep breath before stepping into view.

"Well hello!" I say cheerfully.

Both heads turn to look at me. I hide my hands behind my back so they can't see me powered up aura.

"Hello? T- uh, Tubbo...?" Tommy smiles and i smile back. He remembers me. "You should get out of here." he laughs shakily. "This dudes gonna kill me. Rude if i do say so myself."

I shake me head. "I'm sure i can handle him."

"Are you sure about that kid...?" The man with the red horns stalks towards me. "Take off that cloak and show us who you are coward."

"I'll pass." And with that I pull my hands from behind my back. "Say good night buddy!"

_Don't mess with my soulmate_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Schlatt anyone?
> 
> im sorry im sorry about how long this took for me to publish. But i promise ill be faster on the the next chapter :)))
> 
> Thank you for reading!
> 
> I would love to here some of your theories! (pls it helps me fix plot holes pls)
> 
> bye! have a good night! day, afternoon what ever time zone ur in
> 
> -bear :D
> 
> |1478 words|


	12. Déjà vu

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello :)) this chpt might be a little confusing sorry bout that

|Tubbo pov|

I had know for a while know that the youngest Elytran kid was my soulmate, but i had kept denying it due to him somehow having no aura. But as I watch him stand up bravely as the man turns away from him to turn to me, I don't second guess myself for a second.

The man stalks toward me with the knife, but a knife isn't gonna do any justice to me. 

"That's not going to do anything man." I spawn in more of my aura, I've done this a million times. Its just another fight. I see Tommy glance at me as he slowly scoots to pickup a metal pipe, careful not to make noise. I smile at him. I've realized that he just doesn't give a shit. He has no aura, yet he still want to help me fight. 

"You think?" He sneers at me, his aura blinking in and out as he tries to form a gun, but I know even his aura ability has its limits. 

"Density manipulation can't take me down idiot." I rise up above him, but I can't help but think about my spaghettis that's sitting on the ground around the corner. I'm actually quite hungry. 

"I know, but this can." He pulls a tube full of light grayish blue mist from his jacket and smiles at me. "You're no match for Elytran." 

Its strange, I've never seen an aura that color. But i guess Tommy has because I hear him gasp, then cover his mouth. 

_"You're no match for Elytran"_

_could it be his aura? Did Tommy loose his aura when he was younger?_

I watch as the man turns away from me to Tommy. "You recognize that huh? You recognize this Tommy?" He swirls around the mist, staring at Tommy. I watch as Tommy has a total break down, dropping the pipe and sliding down the rough wall of the alley way. 

|Tommy pov|

I feel like I can't breathe. Why would he have that? Tubbo is still hovering above us, his cloak blowing in the wind. I cant see his face, but i can tell he's confused. 

My breathe starts shuddering, and my shoulders start to shake. I feel like barfing again. 

"Awww poor wittle Tommy." The man grips the tube and gets in my face. "I bet you remember me now." He spits at my feet. I look up at him, tears falling. "Who am I Tommy." 

I shake my head, I don't know who he is, though he feels so familiar. 

"You little-" He grabs me and hauls me up to my feet.

"Hey!" I watch Tubbo glide over to us through my tears.

"Who am I." He holds his knife to my neck. I shudder, something about this feels deja vu. I cant put my finger on it. 

"WHO AM I?!" He yells in my ear, pressing the knife a bit into my neck. I can't feel blood dripping down under my shirt from my neck. I shut my eyes tight. 

_"stay back. Or ill kill her."_

_red_

_dark_

_"Do something tommy!"_

_"Please no."  
_

_cold_

_bright_

My eyes snap open, and i check my surroundings. I'm in the alley way again, and there is still a knife held to my throat. 

I feel weak.

_This is what you wanted right?_

_You wanted to die?_

But i don't want to die like this. There's too many things i haven't said. Too many memories to make. Too many things to live for. 

"I-I don't remember your name." I glance at Tubbo who is still hovering.

"I'm sure you remember this huh?" He hold the vile in front of my face, mocking me.

"You bastard." I sat, weak. I can't move or he will slit my throat, but I see Tubbo lower himself to the ground to pick up a rock.

_"hang on"_

My eyes dart around. Who said that? 

_what?_

_"oh my gosh it worked."_

_who are you? and why are you in my head?_

_"it's me, Tubbo"_

_what the-_

_"I'll explain later okay?"_

_ok_

_"You need to run home as soon as i throw this rock."_

_What? but I cant leave you idiot, this is the second time you've saved me._

_"Please."_

_ok_

_"promise me."_

_what!? no._

_"promise me."_

_Okay. fine I promise._

_"Good."_

_how will I find you again?_

_"i don't know, come here again?"_

_Okay_

I smile as Tubbo lifts himself off the ground quietly.

"Aw wahh wahh. Also, kid." i watch the man turn around to look at Tubbo. "You don't need to go all rescue mission on me. I'm not going to kill him."

"What?" I say surprised as he takes the knife away from my neck. 

"It was just a warning. You, on the other hand, might have to die." He walks slowly over to Tubbo in the air. Slowly unclasping the blue aura in his hand. "De ja vu isn't it Tommy." I shiver, shutting my eyes tight.

_He kneels down at my level, i shiver as he wipes my tears off my face._

_so cold._

_"DONT FUCKING TOUCH HIM."  
_

_red_

_he traces a finger of my neck where the mark is and whispers in my ear, "we are going to have some fun aren't we."  
_

_"Please no."  
_

_bright_

I shake my head again. These little spurts are coming out of nowhere, and i don't know how to stop it. I watch as the man pulls out the grayish blue aura.

"My name is Schlatt, and I'm going to destroy you." He tugs on his tie as the blue mist swirls and takes the form of a dragon. He smiles. "You miss your mum Tommy?"

I'm sobbing now as he stalks towards Tubbo with my mothers aura in hand. 

_my eyes widen as he moves the gun away from me, to my mom. I grab his arm suddenly unfrozen._

_so very cold._

_"wanna do it yourself buddy?"  
_

"Wanna do it yourself buddy?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO! new chapter! chapter 12! i hope this wasn't too confusing :))
> 
> thank you for reading!
> 
> ty ty <333
> 
> hope you enjoyed 
> 
> byee
> 
> -bear
> 
> |1033 words|


	13. For me okay?

|Wilbur pov ooh|

I sit in my lightly lit room, wrapping my fingers in bandaging. Everyone is asleep except Techno, I'm surprised i didn't wake anyone up with my aggressive strumming. My fingers are bleeding and my eyes are brimmed red. Tommy hasn't come home yet, but Niki made a point of telling us to leave him be. Gosh, I've never seen Niki yell as hard as tonight. 

I think we all surprised each other. Tommy found his soulmate, Phil cried for the first time since Mom died. Niki yelled, and Techno yelled back. Niki never yells, and Techno always respects her. This whole thing is a mess.

I put down the guitar, sighing to myself. I lean over to get disinfectant wipes, wiping the droplets of blood off the strings. My fingers throb. I can see the dent that the strings made as i roll them up. I'm worried about Tommy. I'm worried about Techno. I'm worried about my dad. 

Dream and Drista had left earlier. I don't think they wanted to be in the drama, and i don't blame them. I still feel bad for Em, she must have gotten yelled at by Tommy. I just hope she kept her mouth shut. 

Phil is more worried about our safety now that Tommy has found his soulmate, but i don't want to hide from my own brother. Techno thinks we should because of the wipers that will be after Tommy soon. 

"Hey Wil?" a voice says from behind me. I flinch, he always does that. He comes into my room without any warning. 

"Yeah?"

"I'm meeting up with Dream to go find Tommy."

"You and Dream are going to work together? You sure about that...?" I scoff.

"Yep. Please don't tell Dad or Niki." He shifts his weight between legs. "I just wanted to tell you in case you wanted to come."

"No. I'm sure Tommy is fine. He's almost 16. Remember?" I think Tommy deserves some time to himself, no matter how much i want him to come home. It killed Phil when we first decided that Tommy would stay at home. Tommy has always hated being alone, so when Dad prevented him from seeing anyone including family he cried for weeks. I would hear him at night, this little nine year old who didn't know what he did wrong. I don't think Tommy remembers that now, but I sure do. 

The second incident happened when he was thirteen, Phil started getting really paranoid, that's when he added the guards. Tommy knew things were changing. He was smart enough to know what was going on, but he didn't know why, and he still doesn't know why. I think Tommy needs an open door, something that will keep him motivated because right now he isn't getting any new doors in his opportunity hallway. He's just opening cabinets in the room he was already in.

Techno huffs and rolls his eyes.

"You can go look for him, but please be carful."

"Me..? Carful?" He laughs, smirking at me.

"Yes. Be carful for me okay?"

"Okay." He smiles at me. "I'll see you in the morning. Night Wil." He leaves closing the door behind him quietly. 

I sigh to myself, I hope Techno finds him because I have a feeling if Tommy gets into to trouble he'll be too stubborn to protect himself, just like when he was younger.

-

|Tubbo pov|

I rummage through my medicine cabinet searching for band-aids and rubbing alcohol. I can hear Tommy sobbing through the bathroom door. He's hid himself in a dark corner behind my desk and has been crying nonstop since we got back. He won't talk to me, or let me clean his wounds. I don't know what's wrong. The only thing is, he keeps repeating,

"Please no." 

I don't know what he is talking about. Though I do suspect it has something to do with the man Schlatt that we ran into today. 

"Ah ha!" I whisper under my breath as I pull out the first aid kit from under the bottles of medicine. I open the door, stepping out of the bright bathroom to my dark bedroom. "Hey Tommy?"

He turns and stares at me. His tears run down his face like waterfalls onto his shirt. "Can you let me clean your wounds?" I sit down next to him, handing him a tissue. But he shakes his head, and turns away. "Please? For me okay?" I plead and he nods, taking the tissue to wipe his tears. I don't know why, but I already feel like I care about him. I haven't known him for that long, we haven't even had a proper conversation. But some how I feel connected to him, like we have similar thoughts and feelings about our situation.

I sigh, scooting to grab the first-aid kit. "Y'know, my mom is gone too. She's not dead, but she sure is to me. I don't know what happened to your Mom, but I'm sure she is proud of you." This is strange, I never open up to anyone. Ever. But as I sit in the dark on the floor next to this kid I met two days ago, I feel like I can share without being judged.

He doesn't say anything. "Are you gonna stay here?" I ask starting to get up. He just stares at me and nods. "isn't your family worried about you?"

"uH- Aheam" clearing his throat. "no i dont think so" he whispers, voice raspy. "They don't really care-" he breaks down sobbing again. Man, he obviously has a lot of trauma.

"Hey... You- you wanna hug?" i hold my arms out awkwardly, and he almost immediately collapses into me. It takes me off guard. I don't hug many people. And when I do its not raw like this. Tommy's vulnerable and trusts me enough to hold him. He sobs into my shirt and gets my shoulder all wet, but I just hold him. I close my eyes, feeling an overwhelming sense of comfort. I'm used to being alone. I've always been alone. So why does it feel nice to hug someone else? To be trusted? 

It's a foreign feeling, but I'd like it to stick around.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CHAPTER 13!!! yay i hope you enjoyed :)))
> 
> this chapter is kinda fluffy...? well its the fluffiest this story is gonna get smh. prepare for pain.
> 
> gimme advice in the comments :))   
> Thanks for reading!
> 
> goodbye <33
> 
> -bear
> 
> |1080 words|


	14. AU explanation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An explanation of my original AU!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So hi uh here's some info on the au. This is my original au, but i wouldn't mind if you used it for your story. just pls give me credit :))

First thing you should know is that everyone is born with an aura _everyone._ So that might put into perspective how weird it is for Tommy to not have one. 

**Basic Auras**

These are the base of an aura that everyone has. You are technically born with your aura, but it generally doesn't reveal its self till ages 6-12. Once your aura has revealed itself you discover many things. 1, what color your aura is. 2, since all kids go to school, the school has the child do a test which determines or predicts how powerful they will grow up to be.

**Aura Colors**

There are unlimited colors for auras meaning most people have their own unique color, even if its almost identical to someone else. The most common aura color for the average person is a simple generic blue, though any blue wavering from that simple shade is considered high class. 

The least common aura color is brown. (cos it looks like shit)

Your aura color is mostly random, but it is slightly based on what your favorite color is as a child, and of course, your class. 

**Aura Abilities**

Aura abilities, unlike aura colors are very set. There are only 20 or so different abilities. I'm not going to name all of them. There also isnt one specific aura ability that that mass average has. 

There are 4 different categories that aura abilities fall into.

1\. _Mechanism_ : powers centered of the manipulation of immanent laws of reality. - this includes abilities like density manipulation, and fly(fly is very rare).

2\. _physicals enhancing:_ abilities that add to your physicals abilities. - this includes things like all the different types of hyper control.

3\. _Emotion:_ These are auras based on emotion. -Includes empaths, healers, and fear manipulation.

4\. _Spawn:_ auras that can change the air into smth of their own. -technically density manipulation could fall under here, but its mostly animal benders and spawn control. 

these powers may seem op, but they all have their limits. heres some examples of people with different kinds of aura abilities.

 **Schlatt** : density manipulation. He can make his aura into solid items, but as shown in chapter twelve, he cant make certain things out of his control like guns. 

**Tubbo** : as far as you know, Tubbo doesn't have many limitations on his aura. He is also the only person in the world with two auras. But lets talk about his hyper control for a bit. He has a variation of hyper control that is almost like telekinesis. This leads me into the other person that we know has hyper control.

 **Techno** : Techno has a different type of hyper control, its like an extension of himself. hes able to spawn in his aura anywhere, and also send messages as we saw in chapter four when Tommy escapes. Techno has high alert senses, but they are not part of his aura ability. Techno has a 30 meter radius limitation. 

**Wilbur** : Wilbur also has hyper control, except his can affect someone's physical performance. he can make people run slower, dampen their strength, etc. The only thing that might slow him down is using his aura ability is quite draining.

 **Drista** : Drista has fear manipulation meaning she draws her power from fear, as well as being able to sense it. The drawback is that she can't use her aura ability without someone elses fear or pain. So she is actually quite weak without it.

 **Dream** : I know i haven't mentioned Dream's aura yet, but he has an aura that completely counter acts Techno's which is why its hard for only one of them to win. While Techno can spawn his aura anywhere, Dream is similar to Drista in a way. His power comes form the people around him. So he can only powerup his aura ability if someone's aura touches him. Essentially sucking up auras.

 **Tommy's mother** : you don't know much about her yet, but as we see in chapter twelve, her aura takes the form of a dragon. She was one of the few animal benders, as their auras are hunted quite often. 

That brings me to the next subject, the swiping.

**Aura Swipers**

This is the main danger of this world. Aura swipers are people who were most often born weak. They hunt for young, powerful kids who haven't got control of their auras yet. Or even weak adults. Alot of them have been on the hunt for the the powerful duo that are only born every 100 years. This is why Tommy is considered in great danger with his class and all. This brings me to the next thing :)) 

**Class**

This is a world where there is quite a bit of class discrimination. There 3 are different classes. First class is the families like Elytran and Revernet. They have won all the tournaments for many generations, and are considered very powerful. Second class is the mass population. They are the average, working class who don't normally get to go to prestigious Aura academies. 3rd class is the bottom class with people who don't normally have aura abilities. 

**Aura tournaments**

Aura tournaments the core of this world. Your class comes from tournaments. The more tournaments you win, the more well know you get. It is very competitive, kids from 13 all the way to full grown adults compete. There's cash reward if you win, the money coming from bets. It is illegal to use stolen auras in a tournament. Tournaments is also where big companies or government officials find their next potential employees. So the more you win, the more opportunities you may get. 

**When you die**

When you die, your aura stays with you inside your body, but can be easily swiped due to you not being able to protect it (you're dead lol) It is generally disrespectful to steal someone's aura after they die unless they left it to someone in their will. 

Your aura is also included in ur burial. After a while, if its not manually extracted out of the body, it forms into a seed to be planted. It then grows into a beautiful tree that reflects you and your life. (keeper of the lost cities anyone :)))

**How much this au bleeds into reality**

This world is very similar to ours. There are cars, phones, social media. the only difference are the auras. Though they do have more high tech weapons, hence the aura swiper. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> questions? i will answer :)) 
> 
> have a nice night/day


	15. Haha you can't find me

|Tommy pov|

Its so quiet. Everyone is asleep. Even Tubbo's fox is asleep, curled up by the foot of his bed. Isn't that funny? He has a pet fox. I don't know anything about this boy, yet I'm sitting in a dark corner of his apartment. Who knows he could stab me or something. 

So I leave. Before I go, I leave a note on the bedside table thanking him and my phone number. Then I put on my shoes and open the door quietly, making sure not to make any noise. I take the elevator back down to the lobby and i chose a nice, soft couch to sit on while i pull out my phone. 

As much as i hate to admit it, i miss my family. I miss Wilbur and his guitar, I miss Techno and his drama, I miss Niki's quiet laugh, I miss my Dad's loud snoring, _I miss my mom._

Yea, I miss my mom. I miss when she was still around, when i could go outside without getting in trouble, when i could go to school and hang out with the other kids. I scroll through my phone, trying to load up Instagram. I have no Wi-Fi, and of course I don't have a data plan because I'm always home to use the Wi-Fi. Bored, and in need of a pass time, I open my gallery. We have synced up photo gallery, so I see everyone's photos. Though its mostly flooded with Niki's photography, I scroll for a bit to see what I can find. 

My finger wavers slightly as I reach a bundle of photos from 7 years back. Techno and Will standing in front of our school, my Mother's beautiful blue dragon circling around them. Will has a wide grin on his face as he tries to get Techno to hold the "First day of school" sign with him. Techno looks bored. He's staring straight into the camera's soul. His hair is still brown in this photo too. I didn't see at first, but I'm also in the photo, photo bombing my brothers. You can only see my eyes as younger me peaks into the camera lens. 

I smile to myself reminiscing in old times when things weren't as complicated. When _I_ wasn't complicated. Even though I miss them, I don't really want to go home. I look out the lobby window to stare at the large house just in time to see Techno and Dream walking out the door.

_What the-_

I duck down so fast that I hit my head on the couch, but its too late. This is yet another reason I hate Techno's incredible senses, and his voices or whatever he calls them. He turns around just fast enough to see the tips of my hair. My heart beats as he turns to tell Dream, pointing at the dorm building. 

There's literally nowhere I can go except back to Tubbo's room. I dash to the elevator just as Dream and Techno start crossing the street. I hurriedly press the door button so the doors will close. I scan the numbers quickly, trying to remember what floor he is on. 

_Shit._

I hit the four, thinking it took me too long to ride down to be any floor under four. I tap my foot on the floor impatiently as the elevator slowly lurches up. The elevator blinks green as it reaches the 4th floor. I watch as the doors open painfully slow before rushing out.

I run down the hallway looking for a room that looks like it would be Tubbo's. But before I reach the end of the hallway I crash into someone. 

"HEY!" a stern voice shouts. i look up slowly to see an older lady standing over me. "Shouldn't you be getting ready for class young man? Why are you running around the halls like a monkey?"

_This is my chance._

"Hah, sorry ma'am I was just going to pick up a friend for breakfast before class, but I seem to have forgotten his room number! How clumsy of me. I'm terribly sorry for crashing into you." I say polite as can be. 

"Oh! Okay then. In that case, who is your friend? Perhaps I could assist you?" 

"Um, his name is Tubbo? he has a green aura." 

"Oh dear, Tubbo has friends now huh? Room 418. To our left." She says crossing her arms.

"Thank you so much Ma'am!" and with that, i speed walk away, trying to be polite and speedy at the same time. 

Once I reach the room, I pound on the door.

"TUBBO!? PLEASE LET ME IN." The door swings open to reveal a groggy boy rubbing his eyes.

"h-huh?" 

I don't let him finish, I push my way into the room, slamming the door behind me. For extra security I add a chair. 

"What? Tommy? I thought you left me." Tubbo stares at me with his eyebrows furrowed holding up the note I left.

"Yea... Sorry about that." I flop down on the bed breathing heavily. 

"What's going on?" he says while walking to the open the fridge.

"Well you see, I don't want to go home." I say staring at the ceiling. 

"Okay....? So why were you in such a rush?" Tubbo walks back over with a jar of peanut butter and apples. 

"My brother and cousin saw me in this dorm building. Haha F's in the chat am I right? But they don't know what room I'm in." 

|Techno pov|

"Techno we should just wait in the lobby for him to come down. We don't know what room he's in." Dream yells at me from the opposite side of the hallway.

"So? We can just keep knocking on doors."

"Tech. We are on the first floor and no one has answered their door except for those stoned boys." Dream starts walking back towards me. I sigh. I know he's right. At this rate it would be easier to sit and wait for him. 

I'm just worried. What if word gets out that he's run away? What if Tommy finds out about who he is. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey sorry it took so long for this one to come out. I think im more in the rythm now so the next one should be out soon :))
> 
> thank you for reading chapter 14!!   
> feel free to read my oneshot [If i could fly] while your waiting :)))
> 
> i hope you enjoyed 
> 
> Theories?? 
> 
> Feedback??
> 
> tysm 
> 
> have a good one.
> 
> -bear
> 
> |1080 words|

**Author's Note:**

> If your new, and dont know me, I'm Chloe, i sign my chapters with -bear, hope we can be friends :)
> 
> I can tell I'm going to enjoy writing this one :))  
> ps, this is only my second time posting on ao3- this story is on my wattpad already, but im trying this out :))
> 
> take care of yourself. 
> 
> thanks
> 
> -bear


End file.
